Reunited, And It Feels Like Crap

As I type this, I have exactly...ohh...seventeen hours to decide.

Against every ounce of better judgement that I have, so help me Jeebus, I am actually considering attending my 25th high school reunion -- even though the very thought of seeing that collection of people once again makes me throw up in my mouth, just a little bit.

Unfortunately, I promised a group of friends (the small handful of friends that I actually had during high school) that if they were going, I would too.

But now, as I sit here with the RSVP in hand, I realize that I truly don't want to go.

So I leave it to you, the subdivided readers, to decide.  "Yes" means I should go, "No" means that I should follow my better judgement and stay home.

Anyhoo, here are a few factors influencing the decision:

• I promised my friends that I'd go.
• My friends, in all likelihood, don't care all that much whether I go or not.
• I was remarkably unpopular in high school, and probably deservedly so.
• I've lost 20 pounds in the last few months and look, for the first time in a long time, not too shabby.
• My wife is a fabulous babe.
• I consider the day I put Gateway High School in my rear view mirror to be one of the single happiest days of my life.
• If my friends decide to actually go out and talk to other people, I'll have no one to talk to.
• I have no nostalgia for high school.  None.  Not one bit.
• If I went, I could make fun of the person who wrote "In Memorandum" at the top of the list of deceased classmates on our reunion Web site. 
• This is most likely my last chance to attend a reunion while I still have hair.
• They're charging $65 a head for a party in a fire hall.
• It'd be a night out, sans kids.
• We'd be blowing a night out, sans kids, surrounded by people I don't particularly care for.

So -- whadda ya think?

Comments

[Scott]

no. No. NO. NOOOOO!!!!!!!

[Smokey]

DO NOT GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Always follow your better judgement. And although you did promise your friends, if they won't be too upset about it, then by all means, don't go.

But then again, if you did go, the day after report would make for good blogging.....

Nah, it isn't worth it. I'd rather read about Mary Worth or the notes of pre-teens you find while walking the dogs than to have you go through the idiot experience of a high school reunion.

My advice: take your wife out that night for a night without the kids. Show her off to total strangers. Know that you look good with hair and minus the weight you lost and that while you might be spending more than $65 per person if you guys go out to a fancy place, you WILL NOT be in a fire hall. The "In Memorandum" thing you'll just have to ridicule privately, I guess.

[Cindy]

Yes, go. Most likely you'll have a better time than you think (or fear). Even if you don't, you and the missus can split that joint and enjoy the rest of your evening out somewhere else.

[deadlytoque]

Normally I would say "go", because there's a decent chance that many the jerks you went to high school with have grown up into decent people, and even if they haven't, it's a chance to remind yourself that sometimes it's OK to be the kind of person with a few close friends and a weblog. But $65 is pretty freaking steep for something like that.

So, here's my alternative: Get ahold of the people you liked, who you told you were going, and apologise, but tell them they are welcome to come visit Chez Braughler any time, singly or together.

Rent Grosse Point Blank.

Kick off your shoes. Put the kids to bed.

And enjoy.

[Mountain Mama]

If you don't want to go, don't go. If you have to force yourself, it isn't worth it.

[yellojkt]

Go for it. Get a couple of blogposts out of it. Entertain yourself by trying to find the biggest loser there. Make sure your wife has a very low-cut cocktail dress on.

[The Wife]

Are low cut cocktail dresses appropriate for a fire hall event?

[Culli]

Go. Go for the blog material. Go so later on you can tell Adam and Kate that no matter what happens there, High School is NOT the end of life.

Like Deadlytongue said, some of those blods who graduated with you most likely grew up into real nice people. The ones who didn't are probably going to look like slobs on the hunt for their past. Besides, with your new studly physique and remaining mane, you might be the hottest guy in the room!

And Julie will be there to talk with if your pals desert you. What do you mean - "nobody"?

Go.

[Ol'Froth]

I'm going to my 25th only to see friends of mine that no longer live in the area. I'm going to ignore everybody else.

[Library Cat]

I'm leaning towards go but I have no right to say that because my 20th is this Labor Day Weekend and I will not be attending. I was thinking about it because it will be my brother who lives in Texas 25th reunion and he says he is going this time. But

a. He's said that before and didn't go.

b. Labor Day weekend should be reserved for going to the lake not boring myself at the Kiwanis club hall.

c. In my tiny hometown they have an alumni reunion for all classes every year and it's all friggin' weekend; there are three events scattered over the four days.

d. I don't remember most of these people, my parents moved a state from away the old hometown the summer after I graduated from high school so I never went back on breaks in college and in case you're not aware yet, I'm not the brightest bulb in the marquee especially when it comes to people and their names.

e. The people I did keep up with will not attend. And since the kids came along I have not really kept up with them either.

So I have now rationalized out that I will not be attending mine for sure. And I thank you for that. As for you...gorgeous wife, gorgeous pictures of gorgeous kids your thin successful self; I'm still leaning towards yes, but just because I want to hear about it. Don't go.

[MsJackie]

I think you should write a funny bit about why you aren't going - something like the "Do you remember Bob Braughler? ... He's Not Here", make enough copies for everyone, rent a limo for the night, you and Julie dress up in your spiffiest duds, drop off the monologue sheets at the over-priced fire hall, and speed away to an evening to remember.... somewhere else. Trust me, you'll be the most popular guy at the reunion!

[Ding]

I told you on Saturday --- GO! It will be fun (not to mention, something to blog about)! My 25th was in the school cafeteria, so I'd consider the fire hall "classy"! You'll be AMAZED at what the "cool" people turned out like -- and you'll be laughing! Don't forget, if you hate it, you can just leave.

[Chance]

only go IF you think you will get a kick out of mocking everyone. If the pleasure you'll get from mocking the people (and blogging the event) is greater than the doubtlessly insufferable boredom you'll feel being there, then go.

otherwise, stay home. i never go to stupid reunions. the only people i want to see back from high school i already see.

you can make fun of the "in memorandum" guy on your blog, where your commentators (witter and more understanding than your erstwhile classmates, i'm sure) will appreciate it more.

[PittLeo]

I say go for the following reasons:
1) You will get so much new blogging material.
2) Show off the wife. Male classmates will be jealous. They will say "How did Bob hook up with such a babe?" Female classmates will be even more jealous. At my 20 year reunion, there was a large number of insecure female classmates who had to show off how well they looked after 20 years. And they dressed up so formally. There were lots of strapless gowns and exposed skin.
3) Networking - you never know who has been successful and could have the power to hire you in case you are ever job hunting.
4) Do not let the fire hall turn you off. It would probably be more expensive if the reunion was held in a hotel ballroom.
5) A night out with the wife and without the kids
Enjoy!

[pointy stick]

"... you and the missus can split that joint and enjoy the rest of your evening out... "

Now THAT'S what I'm talking about.

Make sure you buy one of those xmas tree air fresheners first.